Ok, ladies. It's 5:30am. I have yet to sleep tonight but that's semi-irrelevant to my question. My dd is going to be 2 this month. My goal was for her to self-wean but I am going nuts. I'm 19 1/2 weeks pregnant. I've been having some nipple soreness the last month or so and have virtually no milk supply. I bled a little the first trimester. I've also been having contractions the last two weeks (when I'm NOT nursing). We're living with my in-laws cuz my dh has been out of work for 6 months. I really cannot handle nursing anymore. I've tried telling her that the milk is all gone, that I have ouchies (which she then kisses my boob and keeps nursing) and that the milk is for the baby (which my mom did successfully when I was 2 yrs, 8 months and she was pregnant with my sister). She doesn't sleep well anyway. She's up right now and hasn't slept. She can't fall asleep usually without nursing. We co-sleep.

Tags: breastfeeding, co-sleeping, extended

Views: 11

Replies to This Discussion

I am pregnant too, and very anxious for my son to wean completely. He is now night weaned and it has helped a great deal.
Has your daughter ever spent the night away from you? This is how my son and I gradually learned that he could in fact fall asleep without nursing. He usually spends one night a month with either of his grandparents, and falls asleep just fine. At the beginning of October (he was 25 months) my son spent a couple of nights with my parents, and when he came home I resolved to put him to be without nursing. He protested the first 2 - 3 nights, but I just held him close and he went to sleep in my lap after about an hour. When he woke up he was allowed to come to bed with us but I didn't nurse him until the morning. That took a little longer for him to get used to. Actually some nights were better than others - sometimes he'd go to sleep with a little fussing and sometimes he'd wail for a long time.
But now, at the beginning of December, he is completely night weaned. He is not completely weaned, but he is down to one quick nurse first thing in the morning, and a quick one in the middle of the day - and only if I'm sitting at the computer!
I really believe night weaning is the first step - believe me, I know all about sleepless nights, having spent 2 solid years of them. I hope you have a breakthrough soon. :-)

p.s. You did use the word gently in your title. While in our experience my son did cry, he did not cry alone. I can assure you he is no worse for the wear. This is just our experience, and again, I hope you are able to wean your daughter in a timely manner (nipple pain is no fun...I know!)
Thanks for the reply. We're visiting at my parent's house for the month. She's gone to sleep several nights without nursing (with my sister rocking her) and has slept 8 hours or so without nursing through the night. She's been going to sleep a lot earlier! So I've made up for some lost sleep and hoping this sticks. She always seems to sleep better when we're at my parents house.
yup yup! I SO hear you :-) I am still "once for bed" nursing my 2yo and I am due in 4 weeks.

I agree that night weaning is the first step. You all need to sleep and learning how to fall BACK to sleep is as important if not more important than how to initially fall asleep. jmho of course.

Would you be at all interested in moving her out of your bed? I assume you will cosleep with your new babe? A toddler bed beside your bed, or a crib mattress (or blankets) on the floor may be enough of a separation that you can rub her back if she rouses and then climb back into your bed. Good news that she has been sleeping 8+ hours at night! Also, how long is she napping? You may need to cut back on the nap to get her to sleep longer at night. A good way to tell is if she naps 2-3 hours and still goes to bed at bedtime quickly then you are still ok. but if she naps 2-3 hours and wakes say at 4pm and then is awake far past regular bedtime and isnt tired then you may need to adjust the nap schedule, shorter, earlier, or something to get life back to normal.

just a few thoughts off the top of my head, and to let you know I too am in the same spot! I'd like to wean totally but I feel awful about it!
She's been sleeping in a toddler bed right next to our bed. She's sleeping so much better since we've been in Miami. She skips naps altogether most days. If she takes even a short nap during the day, she goes to bed at 2am.

We just found out she has to have hip surgery (for congenital hip dysplasia) and will be casted for a total of 6 months. So I'm kinda glad she's still nursing. I think it'll be a great comfort to us both.
oh poor sweetheart! Yes I am sure it will be a comfort for both of you!

my 2yo is the same for naps, She can handle a 20 minute nap early in the day fine but anything late and its a later bedtime. We put her in a twin bed so I can climb in with her and that helps too, we stopped exclusivley cosleeping when she was around 6-8 mos old but I cherish all the time I get to spend snuggled up with her... sounds like things have settled down for now at least, YAY on more sleep :-)

Oh! also, we had trouble sleeping when the 2yr molars started bothering her... yours is around that age too so check on that maybe?
My milk ran out when my son was 14 months old (I too am pregnant, 23 1/2 weeks right now) and it took until just last week for him not to ask for it anymore (he's 16 months now). So he nursed for 2 months without getting anything substantial, maybe only a drop or two. I was actually kind of hoping that he would keep going until the new little one arrived, so that he could help with engorgement, etc, but it looks as if that's a no go. So maybe your daughter will still stop on her own? Although with the cast coming now, it sounds like continued breastfeeding might be more of a blessing than a hinderance. Good luck with everything! When is her surgery?
I totally thought that's what would happen, that she would eventually get tired of not getting any milk. My supply seems to have gone up the last month or so. I'm 25 1/2 weeks now. I'm thinking we'll be tandem nursing cuz her first hip surgery is February 18th, 3 months in a spica cast, surgery on the 2nd hip, 3 months in a spica cast...baby #2 born at some point in between. I was going to go with the flow as far as weaning so I figured tandem nursing might be in the picture. I am looking forward to not being engorged and not having the issues I had the first time around!

Karen-when do they get 2 year old molars...she's already 2 and Im thinking this would be a bad time for more molars!!
Its so obvious when our nurslings are still there just for comfort isnt it! I too ran dry months ago, but she didnt care, now she gets some colostrum and says its "blech" but still wants her bubba to go to sleep. I am a mix of Awwwww and AArgh! lol

The molars should be soon!! My dd turned 2 at the beginning of October and she just bust the bottoms through before Christmas, we are still waiting on the tops! One good thing though is that they seem to come in easier than the rest of the teeth do. Runny nose, chapped cheeks and some restless nights, but nothing a little ibuprofen couldnt help...

Some get them earlier though, check, and if she has 2 molars behind the eye teeth then you are good - if there is only 1 then the 2 yr molars haven't yet made their glorious appearance. :-)

Thanks that was helpful. She has all four of her first molars, but none of her second. I do remember the first molars just appearing there, out of nowhere (no fever, drooling, complaining) so hopefully it'll be a similar experience.

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