Do you have any "I wish I had known that as a soon-to-be new mom?

As an expectant mom you are stepping in a 'black box' of baby care, breastfeeding, help resources, advice from everyone (if you want it or not ;-), products and a lot of other things that you wish you had someone else experience what worked and what didn't.

For example think about:

swaddling, nursing, pacifiers, diapers, baby massage, baby carriers, crying, sleeping rhythm, baby gas, ointments, burp cloths, outfit sizes, recovery, bonding, books, CD's, white noise etc. etc.

 

Do you have any 'I wish I had known that as a soon-to-be new mom?

 

 

 

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Replies to This Discussion

Hi Randy,

Thank you so much for your great list of tips. I guess everyone has to feel for themselves what works best with so many things, but you need to know that it is available and out there. Like you had with your hand pump, cloth diapers and the lactation consultant.

A great tip regarding getting clothes for your little one is to find some on Graigs list or at a secondhand store. Baby clothes are rarely worn and hardly ever used a lot.

And that you feel all over the place is something a lot of woman don't expect. But it's part of becoming a mom, hormones etc.. Just be carefull that it isn't going into a postpartum depression. If you are feeling really depressed, lose your appetite, can't care for yourself, have anxiety or pannic attacs then contact your doctor right away.
I wish I would have known that hospital births were not the only option and that the midwifery model is much more humane and caring. I also wish I would have had more confidence in my body's ability to birth my child. Regarding things: Baby clothes. For the first 2 to 3 months, my baby was swaddled and held by me, no time or opportunity to show off the clothes. She was mainly in shirts, diapers and blankets. The whole bedding set: bumper, comforter, etc. not recommended due to SIDS risk. The crib was a waste of money, she still sleeps with us (we never intended that, it just happened). I so badly wanted a changing table, but I'm glad we didn't get it. Baby powder, lotion, oil, absolutely not necessary. Babies smell naturally wonderful.

I also wish I would have known more about baby behavior. Now a few years later, I know more than before and discovered that my baby's cry wasn't because I didn't have enough breastmilk or because of a constant need to be held. She was just completing the famous fourth trimester that Dr. Harvey Karp talks so much about. I wish I would have read his book or watched his DVD prenatally. As a matter of fact, I just watched his DVD today with my daughter and she asked me to swaddle her. I had to find a big blanket and she laid there so peaceful and happy. It's so incredible now that she can talk and express herself to think back to the early days and say to myself, ohhh so that was what you wanted then :)

I don't know where the recommendation that "if you are breastfeeding you need a pump" came from. There is no need to buy a pump unless you're returning to work or school. Even if a baby comes prematurely, the retail electric pumps won't be effective in establishing a milk supply. They are only good after the supply has been established by the baby or, in the case of prematurity, a hospital grade breastpump. If you want to pump an occasional bottle for your husband to feed the baby and take a break, a manual pump is good enough. Your hands can also do the same or even a better job than a manual pump. If you are a staying home mom, but have to go out of town or something of that nature, there is always the option of renting a hospital grade breast pump from any rental station $40 plus dollars for a week and you're good to go. You will also need to get the kit for the pump, but usually those kits can become manual pumps or include a manual pump.

In general I wish I was better prepared in terms of seeing the world from the baby's perspective. There will always be somebody giving you things, but the best gifts for your baby come from your inner self and the implementation of the knowledge learned prenatally.

Saray
www.mothersutopia.org
Hi Saray,

About breastfeeding and giving a bottle occasional. I wish I had my baby get used to drinking from a bottle once in a while. Even though I was breastfeeding. When he was 4 months I had a wedding to attend from which I couldn't come back every 4 hours. So a month beforehand I tried to let him get used to a bottle with pumped milk. He refused to take it, rather starve for 1,5 day and cry untill I couldn't handle it anymore and gave in. I wish I had know that these little babies can be so stuborn and I would have started with giving some milk in a bottle a lot sooner. So he would be used to it.
Yes, you're absolutely right, they can be stubborn, I've seen them:) Just think if you were living your whole life in the USA in the same city and one day you had to move to China; there is going to be some adjusting to do. At 4 months, his whole life, he only knew his mama's breast (too sweet). Some moms have found the use of a sippy cup instead of a bottle very helpful when their babies refused the bottle and are about 4 plus months of age.

The best time to introduce a bottle is after the first growth spurt has passed, at about 3 weeks old. You will not be able to miss it :) At that time, your body has already gotten the message from your baby to increase milk production, so the bottle will not interfere with that necessary communication. Great point Gea!

Saray
www.mothersutopia.org

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