Share 'What to say after someone's traumatic VBAC?'

Say someone had her vbac without an epidural a week ago .  However, she wanted the epidural at 8 cm (like most in transition do) and didn't get it.  She ended up with a 3rd degree tear/episiotomy and burst blood vessels in her face from pushing, this was after being screamed at to stop pushing because the doctor wasn't there.  And all of this after pitocin was pushed and contractions went through…